Belly right up...It's Chow Time!
Or are the Gods just crazy?

Cynthia, Gary, &ct.,

Yes, there is ample evidence and logic in support of the notion that we are in the final stage of preparation to be served up on someone's dinner plate or chow dish as the case may be.

Much of this apocalyptic rationale comes straight from the mainstream, good ol' time religion. The Christian and Islamic majorities believe that we are about to be harvested for a cosmic feast of some sort. The lucky few will become the nectar of Allah, but the unbaptized masses will be served as Satan's chow. Why is it that Satan always gets the bigger portion at the cosmic salad bar? One might suppose that Allah would be getting jealous and hungry, or just lean and mean.

In any case, the aroma of the smorgasbord is in the air, the crackling of the cooking fires is heard nearby. The celestial dinner guests are already arriving from around the galaxy. Some of the visitors are so unmannered that they can't even wait for the dinner bell to sound before dipping their fingers into the fondue. The more experienced guests, however, are passing up the bovine hors d'oeuvres, not wanting to spoil their appetite for the main course.

And don't we deserve it? Is this not our just dessert: to be someone else's? How did we ever get off thinking that we had some greater destiny; that we would be higher up on the cosmic food chain: sinners that we are? Doesn't that rhyme with dinners? It sure doesn't rhyme with diners.

Yes, one does not need to be terribly prescient or clever in order to have le soupcon (fr.) that the soup's on.

Of course, let's not forget Jack & Co. These clever folks see a few crumbs falling from the celestial buffet table and jump to the conclusion that the Gods must be crazy. The Gods must be crazy enough to provide us with knives and forks and map to the Restaurant at the End of the Universe. Well, good luck, Jack, but I don't think the Gods are quite that insane.

I cannot help but view both of the above scenarios as being amusingly naive.

But, hey, don't let me spoil anyone's dinner!



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rev. 6/13/00